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BROWSE REVIEWS Click on a letter to browse through the reviews on this site: |
THE MUMMY RETURNS (2001) Starring: Brendan Fraser, Rachel Weisz, John
Hannah, Arnold Vosloo, Oded Fehr, Patricia Velasquez, and Freddie Boath Directed by Stephen Sommers We are in serious trouble... Those are the words that Fraser so wisely used
in the first film, and with that experience he was most certainly on the
ball. THE MUMMY, as I'm sure most people know, was a major hit in 1999
and hit theatres in time before the threat of a Phantom Menace hit
multi-plexes. It grossed a lot of cash and though Universal, the studio
behind it, probably said a sequel was in the works before the grosses,
I'm sure the hundreds of millions it made didn't hinder its chances of
getting a sequel made a lot sooner. And this is the end result... Well all the familiar faces are here, with
Fraser returning as Rick, our fearless hero. Along for the ride right
alongside him are Evelyn (Weisz), who was the mousy little heroine the first
time out and is not a head strong Catwoman who, in the eight years that has
lapsed from the first outing, has acquired the skill to kick ass without
breaking a sweat. The two are now married and have produced an adorable,
charming little son named Alex (newcomer Freddie Boath). And there is of
course the comic relief in the form of Evelyn's drunken brother, Jonathan
(Hannah). Though the two charmless hero's are now parents, it doesn't stop
them from searching ruins in Egypt for old artifacts. The artifact they are
now in search for is a gold bracelet which belonged to a warrior known as the
Scorpion King, who sold his soul to the God of the Underworld (or whatever),
so he could have revenge on those who defeated him and his army thousands of
years earlier. Those who find the Scorpion King and destroy him will have
power over the hellish army he commanded, and guess whose back in business,
but our old friend the Mummy (once again played by Arnold Vosloo). Along for
the ride right along beside him is his own love (in the film she is the
resurrection of the woman he sacrificed his life for, but why wasn't that
known in the first film?). Through a series of incoherent events, it's the
tow headed little boy who has the gold bracelet locked on his wrists, and is
kidnapped by the bad guys (and of course shows little fear and finds time to
crack a few jokes). Through a series of even more incoherent events, mom and
dad are hot on the trail and guess what happens? You'll never guess... I will give the film this much, it doesn't
ignore the events that occurred in the first film and pretty much expands on that.
Unfortunately for me, I didn't remember squat about the first movie and had a
hard time remembering it when this one asks me to remember (at one point the
Mummy unleashes four of his supernatural soldiers on our hero's, and Fraser,
once again in his infinite wisdom, cracks, Not these guys again! I
don't even remember the soldiers). And though the films sole purpose is to
make sure it has no purpose, I shamelessly (or shamefully), enjoyed the
movie, but not for the movie itself. I enjoyed the experience of going to the
film with my wife and two kids. My son (and a friend of his who tagged
along), and daughter had the time of their lives and am thrilled they enjoyed
the experience. Though the movie wasn't remotely good, and didn't have the
power to bring out the kid in me (which is what a good popcorn movie should
be able to do), watching them enjoying themselves, and hearing all about the cool
scenes afterwards made the whole thing worthwhile (expect by the time we
reached Subway, all conversation about the movie had ended and completely
forgotten). I do think the film was lame, the effects
atrociously bad (during the Scorpion King's big final battle sequence, he
pays homage to video game graphics that are over a decade old), and a lot of
it downright boring (the villains scenes are more interesting to watch), but
I am recommending the film purely for its sheer stupidity. There is one scene
where these tiny little creatures (I have absolutely no idea what the hell
they where), attacked both the villains and the hero's and at one point
Fraser ignites a stick of dynamite and throws it their way. Two of the little
critters actually fight over it before it blows them to kingdom come, and
that scene was a little cute and made me laugh my ass off (the only time I cracked
a smile throughout the entire thing). It's a complete waste of hundreds of millions
of dollars, but the kids enjoyed themselves and a lot of people in the
theatre (full house), appeared to be having a good time. So, if you have
nothing to do and money to waste, head on down to the theatre for a
forgettable experience. You'll see a movie that makes a half-assed attempt to
take itself seriously but you'll know better. My Grade: B- |